Lois warns Peter not to get drunk, but sure enough he does and the next day he goes to work with a hangover and Mr. Weed fires him from his job at Happy-Go-Lucky Toy Factory. Peter is forced to apply for welfare but they accidentally send him a check for $150,000. The family goes on a spending spree and buys everything they've ever wanted. Peter feels guilty, so with the help of Brian Peter flies a blimp over the Superbowl stadium and drops the money into the field. Peter and Brian are arrested and the rest of the family helps them get off.
Peter tries to help Meg learn how to drive but he accidently runs into a satellite and knocks out Quahog's cable. Peter can't live without cable but Lois seizes the opportunity to get Peter to interact with the family. Peter ends up annoying the rest of the family.
Lois gives Stewie a vegetable and Stewie hates it very much. He decides to create a weather machine that will destroy all vegetables. The episode also features William Shatner voiced by William Shatner.
It's Stewie's first birthday and Lois wants everything to be perfect. She wants to join in on the fun instead of doing all the work. As a result, she books the party at Cheesie Charly's. Peter goes to confirm the reservation and ends up losing it. Peter tells Lois that he will make sure they everything works out fine for the party. He causes a parade/circus route to come right to The Griffin House.
Meg meets a girl named Jennifer, who is the only one who has attempted to befriend Meg. Jennifer invites Meg to a party. Lois wants Meg to be at Stewie's first birthday party but Peter allows her to go to. What Meg doesn't know, is that Jennifer is part of a cult that plans to kill themselves at the party. Lois is angry that Meg isn't at the party so Peter goes to pick her up. Meg and Peter leave just as the rest of the cult kill themselves.
Meanwhile, Stewie believes the party that is being planned is really a plan to return him to the womb. He tries to runaway from The Man in White but then decides to play the offense. The cult leader comes to Stewie's party to retrieve Meg, but Stewie thinks he is The Man in White and kills him with a deathray.
When Peter is at Chris's soccer game, he gets into a fight with someone he think is a man. He finds out that he accidently knocked a pregnant women unconcious. Peter is put under house arrest and is stuck at home. He turns his basement into a bar, but when Lois becomes a dancer she becomes the star of the bar.
Meanwhile, Stewie is having teething pains. He decides that he'll build a time machine to get around it.
The Griffins get new neighbors, The Swansons. Lois becomse friends with Bonnie Swanson, the ever-pregnant wife of Joe Swanson. Mr. Weed needs a new player on the baseball team and Lois thinks Peter should invite Joe to play on the Happy-Go-Lucky Quahog Toy Boys baseball team. What he doesn't know is that Joe is paralyzed from the waist down and shows up to the game in a wheel chair. Joe does many different tricks on his wheel chair and helps win the game. A jealous Peter decides that he wants to be a hero like Joe. So, Peter goes to free hostages from a bank raid. Two comical criminals are there. Peter gets out unharmed and the criminals are caught. The family tells a sad Peter that Joe may be a hero, but Peter is their hero.
Meg keept trying to meet Kyle Swanson, but he won't talk back. He finally talks back when Meg talks about him instead of herself.
After Chris is kicked out of Youth Scouts because all he does is draw, Peter is determined to get him back in the Youth Scouts by taking him to New York. On their way, Peter has to use the restroom so they stop at Geranimo's Palace Indian Casino. Lois has a gambling problem and by the time Peter gets out of the bathroom, she has lost their car and alot of money. Peter tries to convince the people at the casino that he has Indian blood in his veins.
Peter persaudes Brian to enter a dog contest so the family can win some money. Peter and Brian get into an arguement when practicing for the contest and Brian decides that he has had enough being treated differently from people. To show him who's boss, Peter takes him down to the vet where Brian learns his lesson.