Lois: Stewie why don't you play in the other room?
Stewie: Why don't you burn in hell?
(Peter and Brain are in jail)
Brian: Uh, how was your shower?
Peter: Oh, I tell ya Brian, all the rumors about dropping the soap are true.
Peter: Oh yeah, you can't hold onto that thing to save your life. Oh, it was slipping all
over the place. Guys were laughing.
Peter: Don't worry kids, daddy is still going to put food on the table, just not as much, so it might get competitive.
Peter: Guys, our money problems are over! We're officially on welfare! C'mon, kids, help me scatter car parts on the lawn.